Thursday, October 6, 2011

Snarky Twilight - Tyler at the Hospital

[Originally posted at Ana Mardoll's Ramblings.]

Bella: Edward pulled me out of the way. And by pulled I mean pushed. And by pushed I mean shoved. And by shoved I mean rammed.
Tyler: Edward?
Bella: Edward Cullen. He was standing right next to me.
Tyler: And you say that with utter disdain because?
Bella: Did you see him next to me?
Tyler: No.
Bella: Did you see him four cars down from me?
Tyler: Now that you mention it...
Bella: And yet he assures me that he was right next to me.
Tyler: So this is being used as an obvious sign that something strange is going on with he of the multiple eyecolors?
Bella: It seems that way, but I don't see the point. He stopped the van with his hands, damaging the car behind us in the process in a way that likely would have killed a human being, and then he held your van off the ground one handed. At this point I'd say his cover is blown.
Tyler: Well if you focused on the other impossibilities he wouldn't be able to so easily dismiss them in a gas lighting kind of way. Surely they've left physical evidence, where as who can say where he was standing? It's his word against your head injury.
Bella: I suppose. Is there something else you wanted to say?
Tyler: I looked this up on the internet and apparently I'm going to make it my life's mission to make things up to you in pushy and controlling ways.
Bella: If I said that everything is fine and you can stop worrying would that stop you from doing that?
Tyler: I don't think so. Apparently my whole purpose here is to become a jerk with the best of intentions.
Bella: I've already got two or three of those in my life.
Tyler: I'm sorry.

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