Sunday, July 1, 2012

Twilight, some responses to Edward in Chapter 9

[Originally posted at Ana Mardoll's Ramblings.]
[Text in bold italic is Edward from the actual book, the rest is possible responses from potential Bellas.]

"I don't want to hear that you feel that way."
"Just so we're clear, the problem isn't that I feel that way, it's that you're hearing about? So if I keep on feeling this way that's fine with you, but if should ever tell you, then..." She tried to find a good word, 'boom' came to mind, as did, 'five state killing spree fueled by emotional instability of the vamperic kind' She gave up on finding words. "But so long as I keep my mouth shut, you're golden. Is that it?"
"It makes me . . . anxious . . . to be away from you."
"That's a classic withdrawal symptom. Maybe quitting cold turkey isn't the best idea, I'd hate for you to binge. Perhaps we could have a phased removal so that by, say, summer, the two of us can separate without you going having these symptoms."
"You were going to fight them?" This upset him. "Didn't you think about running?"
"Screw you for taking offense at how I deal with life threatening situations, and in case you didn't notice they had me cut off. Two in front, two behind. To get away in either direction I'd have to run down and across the street at the same time. To intercept me they'd only have to run across.
"I'd be running the hypotenuse, they'd only have to run one of the legs. The hypotenuse is longer than either of the legs. I'd have further to go, so even if I could outrun them that doesn't necessarily mean I could escape.
"Or, to put that in terms you might be able to understand you warthog faced buffoon, they had a head start. What in the flying fuck makes you think I could have outrun them?"

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