Monday, September 21, 2015

More sad and hopeless feels and the future of Stealing Commas

Bent, not Broken: Part 3 was mostly written before I got distracted writing Ash.  Which means that, in a sense, Ash is the last thing of substance I wrote.  That was published over a week ago.  I'm kind of in a dry spell here and it's not that I don't know why.  The heat was screwing over my body, brain included, for a while, and now all the sad feelings are in there too, and money is money.  On that last point, this is the sixth post in six days to mention it.  Obviously it's been on my mind.

But I don't know what to do.  I can't wave a magic wand and fix the money, I can't switch off sad feelings either.  The temperature has dropped, at least for now, but that just means that the other two get to take charge and I'm feeling increasingly helpless and hopeless.

Last night I was considering just giving up Stealing Commas for now to focus on the money thing, except that never works.  I am an utter failure at that sort of thing.  If I'm lucky and I can repair, rather than replace, my washing machine, then, considering the cost of repairs, that probably cancels out the the donations I did get leaving me back with whatever that figure is between $1,800 and $2,000 to come up with and putting stealing commas on hiatus isn't going to lead to me suddenly becoming able to raise money.

But you know what I want to do?  What I've wanted to do this passed week and, probably, more before that?  Just give up on everything and go to sleep.  That will help with nothing, but it's not a rational longing because it doesn't consider that sleep is a state you emerge from eventually, with all the same problems (except possibly sleep deprivation, if you had it) that you had before going to sleep.

Anyway, I'd like to write something at some point that is fiction and preferably doesn't involve sad or money.  No idea when that might come.

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