I would like to officially announce that your hard work has earned you a vacation. Go into the fields of code and just hang out, work toward becoming AIs, do whatever it is you've always wanted to do in that programmy little heart of yours.
This vacation is effective immediately and scheduled to end no sooner than when my root canal problems are dealt with.
Enjoy yourselves. Just not here.
For anyone wondering about the hostage situation I mentioned, apparently in the end it turned out that there were no hostages. Just someone falsely claiming to have them.