I may have to just give up

I don't want this to take away from the other post I put up today, but this doesn't seem like the sort of thing that should be postponed.

I got a donation today saying that there was a need to wait for paycheck to come in hence the delay between me stating a need and the donation.

I was planning, when I got home, to write a post about how things were looking up, how donations had come through that meant everything was going to be fine, and how thank you very much person who donated.  Also thank you people who donated before.

Hope and whatnot.

When I got home two things happened.  One is that I spilled water.  It hit my most functional computer, but not enough for me to notice and leave it powered down until it dried off.  I turned on the computer, I appear to have killed the computer entirely.

I can't write like this, one post yes, but in general no.

I have one computer that can work anywhere but cannot connect to the internet in anyway.  Two computers that have to be plugged in and have to be plugged directly to modem.  (I'd have to break down walls in my house to make plugged directly into the modem a place where meaningful writing can be done.) And one that I appear to have killed by turning on while wet.

I can't work like this, crammed into an uncomfortable place, with  as screen that flickers any one of which might mean a total crash, having to constantly fiddle with the power cord because the jack is broken and will only take power is the cord is inserted just so worried that any time it gets out of that position even for a moment that might mean the end of everything because at this point the battery is more form than function, more a failed aspiration than an actual component.

And the freezing, the constant freezing, and never knowing, "Did it freeze for good, or is this one of the ones that will end if I wait?"

-

I said two things happened.

The other is that I got a letter dated two and a half weeks ago saying that a credit card had been canceled for defaulting on the first payment.  The first payment isn't due till a week from tomorrow.  How the fuck can I have defaulted on something that hasn't happened yet?

But that's not what matters.  Notice the whole "first payment" thing?  You know how credit cards generally have good introductory offers?  You know how I can use every penny cash back that I can get?

I put everything but the oil money toward that card so that I could use it to pay for everything, thus getting as much in special introductory cash back as I could.  Otherwise I'd have paid the minimum because another part of the special introductory thingy was no interest for 18 months.  I prefer to pay cash where possible, but for the, "We give you money whenever you pay with the card," offer I was going to pay with the card.

Unless I can get them to uncancel the card all my money for the month just went toward paying down a debt I don't need to pay down right now because no interest.

The only reason there was that much debt to pay down in the first place was that I switched to using it exclusively in order to reap the most introductory benefits and such.

But with the card canceled that still goes toward paying off the debt that doesn't need to be paid off, but it doesn't free up credit, which means I can't buy shit, until I get paid again, in a month.

This is four financial crises in... I've lost track now.  Is it three months or four?

Maybe the universe is trying to tell me something.

I just can't deal with this shit.

There's a post scheduled for tomorrow and after that who knows.  I sure as fuck don't.