Thursday, March 9, 2017

This is not the world I asked for

I want to live in a world where my dad didn't see me falling to the ground as an excuse to vent his frustrations (which weren't even directed at me) by gaslighting me and then yelling (really, really loudly) at me when I didn't go along with his lies about what happened, just like he did when I was little.

I want to live in a world where that didn't ruin my mother's already strained birthday celebration.

I want to live in a world where the closest thing to bad that happened while I was at my sister's house was her boyfriend and I both being reminded of the fact that we don't have and have never played Kingdom Hearts in spite of both of us really wanting to.  (I swear, when I put it on the wishlist I was convinced the first one, remastered, came out on February 28th.)

I want to live in a world where my dad's response to seeing me spin out of control onto the ground, with a bit of pain involved, is to hope his daughter is ok instead of weaving a tapestry of lies about how his son got there.

I want to live in a world where whatever perverse drive it is that pushes someone to show their dominance over another by replacing the victim's truth with their lies *takes breath* doesn't exist.

I want to live in a world where love, including compassion, trumps petty power games.

I don't.

8 comments:

  1. I'm sorry.

    ---Redcrow

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  2. You deserve a better world

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  3. I actually do have a copy of kingdomhearts for psp, and plan to install a few emus of the original on my psp as well...but yea, sorry everything else is how it is. we'll work on it. =)

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