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Saturday, March 9, 2013

Snarky Twlight - Non-food analogies

[Originally posted at Ana Mardoll's Ramblings.]

Edward: You know how everyone enjoys different flavors? Some people love chocolate ice cream, others prefer strawberry?
Bella: No. I've lived for seventeen years on this planet... and a few elsewhere; don't ask. I won't tell you. Anyway, seventeen years on this planet and it has never come to my attention that there might be variations in preference when it comes to taste. Tell me, do similar variations exist in preference when it comes to sound? Could that explain the myriad musical styles? Anyway, you were talking taste. It certainly has never occurred to me that people could enjoy different things, I thought that the variety of different types of cuisine was merely an artifact of not having enough of the stuff that everyone universally wanted most to go around.
Edward: Sarcasm.
Bella: You noticed?
Edward: Moving on.
Bella: Yes?
Edward: Sorry about the food analogy — I couldn’t think of another way to explain.
Bella: Clearly a failure of imagination on your part.
Edward: Come on.
Bella: You know how some people like Star Trek, and some people like Star Wars, and others like things that aren't even in the genre of science fiction?
Edward: Ok, that's one example.
Bella: You know how some people like skiing and others like sailing and others like curling up with a good book?
Edward: Listen-
Bella: You know how some people like blondes, and others like brunettes, and still others like redheads?
Edward: The point is-
Bella: You know how some people prefer missionary while others prefer-
Edward: HEY! Not cool.
Bella: You know how some people prefer jazz while others like concert band sized wind ensemble?
Edward: You already did music.
Bella: That was before you said you couldn't think of anything but food.
Edward: Can we just-
Bella: You know how some people prefer plays, others movies, others books, others comics, others tales told 'round the campfire?
Edward: I think you've made your-
Bella: You know how some people prefer Macs and others prefer anything that isn't a Mac to the extent that Mac has been officially excised from the category of personal computer to the point that PC means, "Not a Mac"?
Edward: This is getting ridiculous.
Bella: You know how some people prefer hands on learning and others prefer more abstract stuff done out of books and on the chalkboard?
Edward: Please stop.
Bella: You know how some people love roses but others prefer geraniums?
Edward: Ok, scent, that's-
Bella: I was talking about the flower as a whole.
Edward: Damn.
Bella: You know how some people love orange while others prefer purple?
Edward: If I surrender now will you stop?
Bella: Unconditional surrender?
Edward: Hell no.
Bella: You know how some people love dogs while others prefer cats?

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[Snarky Twilight Index]

2 comments:

  1. I faintly wonder how all this can end: I mean, what will this Bella do with this Edward? Heh...

    ReplyDelete